Last month, in the Verbalists debating club, we had a lively discussion on the subject of “Modern Dating”. The world of dating has changed dramatically in the past few decades. The old ideas and rituals of courtship are gone, replaced with new standards of relationships and dating. But, are we better off?
Traditional courtship — picking up the telephone and asking someone on a date — required courage, strategic planning and a considerable investment of ego (by telephone, rejection stings). Not so with texting, e-mail, Twitter or other forms of “asynchronous communication,” as techies call it. In the context of dating, it removes much of the need for charm; it’s more like dropping a line in the water and hoping for a nibble.
On the other hand, many would argue that today’s communication platforms offer a wider variety of connections, and a wider network seems better than a narrower one. We have cellphones, which facilitate last-minute get-togethers. Platforms like Twitter and Facebook let you connect with a wide variety of people, and you can know someone’s political leanings, interests, and hobbies before you ever meet in person. More options may delay the process of picking one, but it seems to improve the chances of picking the right one, instead of simply settling for what’s in front of you.
“Dating culture has evolved to a cycle of text messages, each one requiring the code-breaking skills of a cold war spy to interpret.” – Alex Williams, The New York Times
“Enough bogus nostalgia for a bygone romantic era. Modern love is not perfect, but women today have choices as never before.” – Jill Filipovic, The Guardian
What do you think? Do you miss the days when a man opened the car door for his date just because he cared? But, is it not much better that today we can learn more about someone before we meet that person? Click here and join this very interesting discussion on our LinkedIn Communication & Languages group.
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